Olé Olé, Olé Olé

Feeling Hot Hot Hot - Buster Poindexter

It's hard not to be drawn into the world of soccer these days with the Men's World Cup tournament.   Everyone in the world becomes a soccer fan and expert over the length of the tournament.  Suddenly people are watching soccer on tv; many of whom would never think of it between tournaments.

Over the years, soccer has provided me many things.  It has provided me with emotional release during stressful times, enabled me to remain relatively fit, and provided me with connections to a wonderful group of soccer people - mostly women.  It has re-enforced my appreciation for the power of community.

Soccer gave me strength and endurance when I needed it most during treatment.  Due to the fitness level attained prior to chemo, I was able to get out to hike and walk through the full treatment schedule, in fact, due to soccer, I was reminded that I needed to get out to feel normal.  My body was used to moving and it was too much a change through treatment to just stop moving.  I had to slow down gradually.

Soccer taught me to play through even when conditions were not favourable.   Anyone who has played soccer in Vancouver knows that the usual soccer season runs through the winter, not the summer.    Games continue through rain, wind and hail.   Only an iced or snow covered field will stop the play and there's not a lot of snow here.    Treatment continues even when you aren't feeling great, the timing is perfect, or there's something else going on in your life.    You have to settle for not feeling great a lot of the time and finding the new normal.

Soccer is all about playing your best both individually and as part of a team.   The Messis of the world don't win or lose tournaments.   My treatment is the same.   I have to treat myself well, eat well, exercise and ask questions do my best to keep myself strong.   I have to work with my extensive team of medical professionals, family, friends, team mates, co-workers and neighbours to help me reach our common goal to keep me healthy.  

The World Cup play has shown me what it means to push even farther even when you know that you have played your full game.  When you are forced into overtime you keep going even though you have no energy left.   As each treatment drains more of my energy, I need to draw a bit deeper day by day to move forward.   I move a bit slower; that's ok but a sign that I need that much more energy to move.

It's about learning to take disappointment gracefully.    To take the disappointment and look back and celebrate the successes so far.   It's hard to do but the second place team or the player who missed the crucial shot does the same.   It's about recognizing those little missteps and turning them into positive moments.  My goal was to complete me treatment on schedule without any disruptions or delay.   I felt like I'd lost when my treatment was delayed just a week.  A set back and a failure to achieve my goal but I know that I've fought hard so far and won't let one set back ruin all the prior successes.

I'm on a theme here with these past two posts.  I guess I'm still working through the disappointment.  The tournament is now over and my next treatment now lined up this week so it's time to move on.   I'm getting to the finish line of chemo with more 'wonderful adventures' to follow.

P.S. Anyone who doesn't want to wait until 2018 for more World Cup madness can enjoy the Women's FIFA World Cup in Vancouver in 2015.  Ole, Ole, Ole, Ole!!!!