Saturday was downer day. One of those days where every person I saw I was saying under my breathe 'Why the fxxk don't you have cancer'? I was throwing it out in my subconscious to everyone in particular the smokers, those carrying a few extra pounds, whiners, teens eating McDonalds, children, seniors, small rodents - really - the message was out to everyone. Ok maybe not children but then it means double cancer for rats.
Random thought: do rats and mice naturally get cancer or is only because we infect them with it while we're doing research?
I put out the warning to the kids to expect negativity from me all day. A bit of anger and a lot of feeling sorry for myself. I figured it was good to get all the downs in one day rather than spread out so let it all pour in. Washed it all away with a long hot bath and a few tears. Release - very good.
I was on the uphill climb and then I discovered I had a rash all over my breast - oh yeah..that's just what I needed. The rash progressed through the weekend into an irritated red mass moving towards itchy. By Sunday in the middle of the night I would have performed my own mastectomy had someone handed me a sharp knife. Self medicated with Tylenol to sleep but still left me with the rash.
Considering my diagnosis, a clinic likely wouldn't want to touch me so as not to mess up my pending treatment. Got on the phone Monday morning to both oncologist and surgeon. Ended up with a prescription for antibiotics for the infection in my breast. Guess I was running a slight fever - feeling the fever now and antibiotics working - like I'm in a bit of a fog which is, surprisingly, quite pleasant. Think I'll hang here for a bit. Yes...I'm good right now. :)
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